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I had an idea on the treadmill this morning.

I’ll admit I thought about this a bit last week, while exercising, when it seems to be the case that I’m not distracted by anything else and there’s a chance to be honest with my own feelings. The more I thought about it, the better I felt about taking it out of my brain and telling somebody else, and so I decided I’d go and speak to a very good friend about it. She’s in London, and so Twitter wins again as a communication tool. By DM I explained what I had in mind, and she didn’t laugh. In fact, she was incredibly supportive and helpful and I then grasped that actually, this had to happen, because if I don’t do it, I’m a fucking idiot.

So, an idea has been born, and now I need to make it a reality before I lose faith in myself.

I have roped in my husband to help. Some people who I know will be honest with me are already involved in making the basis of this idea fit for purpose. Next week, I have two letters to write, and they will probably be the most difficult things I ever produce with words. I’m already quietly humming in excitement at the possibilities, if only that, at the end of this, I did something that matters for me. That’s the key in all of this: even if nothing happens as a result of the series of events, if all I am met with is silence, that’s absolutely fine, because it actually doesn’t matter. I know what needs to change, and it may no happen in my lifetime, and if that is the case so be it, but I want to try and make a point.

Things only get better when people take their ideas and stand by them. You don’t give in, you don’t cave to pressure and walk away. You have something that matters, and so you act on it. More often than not, there is nothing that results in the real world but for you? The results can be game changing. You gain confidence, you begin to believe in yourself more, and you become capable of things you were not before. This is what I need to do for myself and if something else comes of it then great, but I don’t expect this idea to change the World, or indeed anything at all. Except by the action of sitting here and producing this post? It already has, and that’s what you need to survive.

This is how I will do it. For now, I will keep details are a secret. It will become clear as to why as time goes on.

Needless to say, you’re with me on every step of the way.