Today I would like to let you in on a secret. What you consider a compliment is very often an insult. That sarcastic one liner? Yup, it can really hurt. When you open your mouth and choose a set of words to deliver, it is actually quite easy to fuck up and not say what you really mean, and that’s why people like me tend to be very quiet until they’re absolutely sure the right context has been placed in the correct order, before mouth is even opened. However, when we arrive in the world of text based communication? You type, and then get this really useful period where that never has to be seen by anybody else until it is exactly what you intend.
Except, of course, it doesn’t work that way, does it?
Having a discussion on social media is lovely, assuming you know the other person with a measure of familiarity. That means when you disagree on something and are well aware that will result in a lively discourse, you have a choice. You can either agree to differ, thrash about for hours and get nowhere, or never start the conversation. The moment you deviate from politeness, frankly, you shouldn’t have started to begin with and if you decide to dig your own hole? Only yourself to blame. Try and be nice, or throw in a swipe? Both of these are very easy things to say, while at the same time take a considerable amount of courage to vocalise. It is nothing to do with either compliment or insults in isolation, but absolutely everything about the person who chooses to utter them.
If you think you can get away with both? You shouldn’t be trying to begin with.
Social media distorts the world, to the point where you can read something on a screen, assume it’s about you (when it is totally and utterly not) and just go off the deep end. I’ve had this happen to me now so many times it’s not funny, and on every single occasion the problem has been the exact same: you want more from this relationship than I’m ever going to give you. The world revolves around you at precisely no point, anywhere in the Universe, however hard you try. You cannot reinvent physics, but yet some people still try. When you end up colliding with individuals such as this, it is probably best for everyone concerned that you run away, terribly fast. The problem with Social media at this stage in proceedings then becomes that because you can’t see the problem exists? You never know you’re in trouble until it is far too late.
Yesterday I was unbelievably stupid, and talked myself into an argument I should never even have started. I thought I was being clever but nope, absolutely not the case. In the end, I didn’t take my own advice, and paid the price. However, what I did learn is that if someone decides that they’re the centre of the Universe and you decide to disagree on that point knowing full well what the consequences will be? You’re on your own.
Next time woman, listen to you own fucking advice.