Reeling in the Years

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Once upon a time, simply locking your account on Twitter was enough to ensure a notion of privacy, but this is no longer the case unless you are 100% active on curation. Encryption and private groups are rising in popularity for a very good reason: VPN’s the only sure fire way to keep people (including the Government) out of your business, but by doing this that vital, worldwide and truly chaotic audience is never available. There is only so much trouble to be caused in a Discord channel, after all. If you know where to look, and you’re not careful with every word that is thrown onto the Internet, it is very easy to fuck up royally.

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Many celebrities will admit in interviews that they never read reviews, because the last thing you want to know is how you fucked up with an audience. I’ve never really had that issue because I know full well how much I fuck up on any given day, and what is then needed is context on how that panned out on a wider stage. There is a morbid fascination reading people abuse you without fear of consequence. It gives a bizarre insight into the moral fibre of those who maintain a public facade of professionalism and yet are happy to destroy randoms when they don’t do as they should. With the anonymity of the Internet, it isn’t like you can pop around their house to correct any errors in reporting, now is it?

When you have a bigger picture of how people treat each other, it makes coming to decisions about how you might fit into that dynamic a lot easier. Some are so twitchy that pointing out a mistake will be enough to garner you an instant block. With those people there is no halfway, and this is probably no bad thing on reflection. Then you are left with choices after the fact, and that’s when the white angel on my shoulder pops up and reminds me that this is only the Internet and its not my job to save everyone. You do what you can, and in the end what should matter more are the people who demonstrate care and are interested in your life to begin with.

Once you grasp that you are the one with power, and nobody else can ever affect that, it is easy to see why arrogant and sanctimonious become insults. Holding a confidence and comfort in your opinions and approach, people will fear you because they do not understand how you work. You can no longer be bullied, or abused. So, when individuals attempt to unsettle that comfort, which seems to happen with almost clockwork regularity, the responses become easier to grasp and respond to. If all you use is the truth, as you see it, things go one of two ways. You find a solution, or you don’t.

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When someone shows me how much I matter to them, I will be more than happy to return the favour. Not only was it satisfying yesterday to be of use to my PT in a capacity other than just a client, it made me realise that the real, tangible friendships I have need more care and attention than they’ve been receiving of late. That’s July’s task, as well as starting my Patreon properly and getting to 11st 5lb. If the person matters enough, you make the effort. That’s what happened yesterday, and all I can do now is see how my reaction is received and then acted on going forward. It takes two people to have a relationship, after all.

If I can keep my end of the bargain up, its a start.