Everybody Hurts

There was that moment, a few years ago, when I got into a fight with someone on my feed about the way I conduct my business. On reflection, I probably wrote about it at the time, and if you were that obsessive about it could go back and find details. That was the first time I heard myself referred to as passive aggressive. I’d say it’s a quite prominent character fault, which is normally kept under control. The Internet however has a way of making me want to be like this, because it is full of people who don’t think but assume that the World revolves around them, which most clearly doesn’t.

Today however it is the scales and my legs making me all ‘come at me, bro.’ I don’t have an issue with the weight situation, on reflection. I know how to make it all stop and go backwards, just have to find the self-control to make that happen. Similarly, my legs went to failure yesterday (again) and yet I get how much stronger the lower half of my body now is. All the various areas of balance that need to be first attained and then maintained can be frankly quite nauseating, especially if you end up having to do several of them at once. Social media becomes a hindrance, after a while, if you’re forced to deal with stupid without a filter.

Someone I greatly respect posted something yesterday that really was quite offensive, in a certain light. It was obviously a joke, which I get, but I did sit and do the WTF Face that now seems to accompany an awful lot of my online existence. It is the same face that stops whenever a guy gets upset at a woman reacting to something that has been normalΒ  behaviour for decades, but only now is becoming socially unacceptable. ‘But what about our feelings?’ they cry, not really grasping that by everybody suppressing the true realities of existence, the whole World ends up getting fucked over eventually.

Then there’s the person on my Twitter feed that very rarely (if at all) converses with me who regards Social media as a diary: whenever something happens to destabilise their existence, they then use their feed in search of love and reassurance. I’d never really considered the safety blanket uses that Facebook and Twitter have, and will VERY RARELY do so myself. However, as that happened this week there’s reason to pause for thought and ask myself the question. If people really matter to you enough to complain about only when they don’t talk to you, who is really at fault? Who is hurting here, the person not getting the attention they crave, or the person who’s happy there’s no conversation at all?

If the answer to all of these issues is truly dialogue, then stating your intentions must start being the norm. So what if you think I’m being pushy and arrogant when I do that. If that’s the case, we’re not friends to begin with. Respect (surely) must dictate that to understand how someone else feels, you listen first. After that, if you don’t like what you heard there’s the choice to politely object or offer a counter argument, or simply fuck off. This is not rocket science, so why is it that I know I can’t unfollow certain people because of the emotional fallout that would result? Am I being too kind, or not hard enough…?

Passive aggressive behaviour is, let’s be honest, the least of my worries.

I use my daily writing as means to sort all this shit out, but this never avoids the drama. Whatever happens, people will pick certain hills to die on and if that happens to be your desire to impose rules, you gotta take the flack when it hits. The trick, I think, is to make it all a learning experience, and grasp it is a fool who believes that their life when involved on the Internet will ever be drama free if they wish to live as they please.

All you can do is think, post, and hope you did a decent job.