Look At Me

I don’t like the way some people on my Social media feed are being influenced by large companies. There’s nothing I can do about it, of course, and by pointing it out I’ll simply be accused of not understanding their feelings. The fact remains, I watch daily as people are far too easily manipulated. No, I’m not imagining this. There is no tinfoil involved. In the Wild West of Social media, the law is not fast enough to keep up with offences. It is the moral turpitude of people involved in making fake news, ‘innocently’ promoting their brand using cheap emotional hooks or simply wanting to draw attention to themselves BECAUSE THEY MATTER DAMMIT that stands between here and social disintegration. Therefore, EVERYBODY has a responsibility, yet very few are prepared to even think about consequence

If you cannot clearly discern reality from the invented, everybody is in trouble.

There are too many problems effectively to solve if you go and stare at the negative for too long. If I have to isolate one that seems to be endemic to all the issues I personally experience, it would be emotional blackmail. I’ve watched this used by the alt-right against Florida schoolkids who simply want to live without fear. I watch politicians use it as a means to justify Brexit, not Brexit and all points in between. The most depressing form, however, is undoubtedly the format that seems to afflict everybody, from nobody to celebrity, which is beautifully encompassed by the desire to be noticed, but at the same time not ending up looking like an idiot.

Considering Social media as a ‘game’ must be done with a great deal of care.


It seems to me that by far the best means by which you survive in this lawless land at present is to keep everything at arm’s length. It works, to a point, until someone appears with their Emotional Blackmail Joker and shoves it in your face. We’ve been ‘friends’ for X years, you can’t do X, Y or Z because I will take this as a personal affront and you will back down. Except for the problem, inevitably, is that you aren’t friends, and never really were. Unless the definition of friendship is quite clear, in this modern world, NOTHING is to be expected or anticipated. NOTHING AT ALL.

If it matters enough that someone is friends with you, then you tell them. That’s why I spent a month last year doing just that. It is why the people I care about have time taken to read their tweets, or blogs, or consider what it is they have to say. I can support people I do not know well, and help them, but this does not make us friends. That only happens when both parties agree to the transaction, and never before. If you believe, whilst reading this that we are friends and that’s something that matters to you, yet we have never discussed whether we are or not? It is time to reassess your definition.

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I refuse to use Social media as emotional blackmail any more. I have followers, of whom a VERY small number (probably less than 70) are people I talk to regularly, of which maybe 25-30 are friends. Of that, less than ten are good friends. I communicate with one person with whom I share a genuine friendship on a daily basis. Just the one. There are three others I’d consider as close or comparable, so that’s four people. Everybody else, let’s be honest, I don’t have a clue about. Some people obviously think we are friends because they talk at me on a daily basis, but many of these ‘conversations’ make me feel uncomfortable. The emotional attachment others have to me is undoubtedly weighted in their favour.

If I cannot accurately discern intent, what chance does anybody else have?


Smart people don’t have these conversations in public, but I’m getting to a point where there has to be some disconnect between the people who believe I’m their friend and the truth, which is I’m not, they’re just a follower. In the end, it is easier to just remove these people from my followers’ list and hope they get the point. The last time that happened, however, it ended in tears because the person concerned believed they deserved to be my friend and that I should return the favour. I don’t need toxic attitudes like that in my life, and to be fair to everybody else here, you shouldn’t be getting attached like that to me, to begin with. It’s unhealthy and ultimately self-destructive.

Sometimes the truth is what everybody needs and deserves.