Avenue Q

The worst part about life right now, undoubtedly, is knowing who I can trust. Immediate family have been brilliant, above and beyond the normal care and consideration, especially when I’ve struggled to keep everything together. The house is quite literally covered with PostIt Notes, helping me remember to be organised, what needs to be done or sorted on any given day. I still forget things, though. Stress is tough.

I have homework to do for next week that I am dreading. It is not necessary, but I see it as vital, because of the inability that currently exists to express myself to others. There needs to be a quiet time and place to complete it tomorrow. I also have pretty much all the lymph nodes on my neck up, which means body’s fighting some kind of infection. This may explain a few things, if truth be told…

notevenmad

Today’s important because there was a bunch of things that needed to be done which have been left alone too long. I’ve fucked one up royally, but the other couple of things that were supposed to happen are at least started. There’ll be another go at cycling an hour tonight (knee said no last night, hopefully the hour’s lunchtime kip will help) and then tomorrow it’s time to do more stuff with the garden.

None of this needed to go in a blog, of course, but this afternoon I realised a number of people, since I was public with my counselling, have simply stopped talking to me. Is that the reason, or is it the process of removing myself from a fandom which has, like it or not, ruined a part of my existence? I dunno, but it is time to work out who the real friends are, the ones that will stick with you through thicc and thin…

2 thoughts on “Avenue Q

  1. While I still play, I am slowly trying to separate myself too. Any transition is difficult, but you’re doing great. You are looking out for you which is the most important thing.

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