The Black Parade

I’m supposed to be taking a Social media break. It’s mostly working. Coming back properly on Friday, no issues, but in the interim, some things should be cleared up.

typing7

Communication is becoming a significant obstacle for progress: once upon a time, it was okay for people to moan 24/7 in my timeline, I’d just mute them and move on. This is no longer an effective coping strategy. As I struggle to improve myself, that constant backwash of selfish muttering needs to be removed, and so I am. 

It doesn’t have to be 24/7 positivity either. What matters more than anything else is dialogue. More people will be engaged in conversation, less stuff retweeted if it doesn’t contribute to discussion. The days of long, rambling paragraphs are over, and everybody was very relieved as a result. It is time to engage Precision Mode.

newtype2

My long-form writing over the last decade undoubtedly exists as part of another complex (and often wildly self-indulgent) coping strategy. I’m not ready as yet to dive into all of those works and decide what needs to be salvaged. For now, there’s a new narrative beginning to form, timeline slowly illuminating. It’s already making me extremely happy.

That’s not a lie either. Part of the reason I’m taking the break is to be able to focus on buttoning down a timeline, working out what happens where, but most significantly to work on dialogue. Talking matters a lot in this new canon. That’s a surprise that’s taking a bit of getting used to, and it’s rather amazing.

typing4

I’ve dispensed with a lot of distant past over the last few years: the other part of this puzzle is eliminating more recent detritus, deciding what needs to stay and go. With a long weekend coming up, this is a perfect opportunity to start attacking the last piles of stuff that lie untouched, and to re-define the space I’m a part of.

Deciding what matters has always been a continuous, articulate process of in and out. Reassuringly, there needs to be very little in, but a quite careful process of marking what stays and goes. I have plenty of ‘things’ in my life, really no need for anything else. What exists, undoubtedly, should be better used. That’s a goal going forward.

typinghamm

This is a careful, considered progress through the recent past. It also acknowledges that however bad things are, there has to be some individual culpability in the mindset. If I’m not happy, complaining isn’t going to fix that. Asking for help will. Finding solutions is better than being fatalistic and not wanting to change.

Yes, this shit is incredibly, horribly hard. Nobody disputes that. Change is the hardest part of life. How you choose to approach it, or how that change is communicated, tells others a frighting amount of detail about what you are. I have no fear from sharing. What scares me most, right now, is going silent.

That’s not ever going to happen again.