I could have stuck my dream from last night up here, but chose Social media for a reason: the reach is better. However much writing this way continues to benefit, the figures are damning. There’s 12 of you here, and me. I refuse, point blank, to go the aggressive blogger route, it’s just not happening. This, of all the places that exist, remains the haven for whatever pops into my head at any given moment.
However, I am a realist. In principle, one of two things will happen, eventually, with this space. It will either become popular, or it will remain in glorious obscurity. Ultimately, I am aiming for the former. Let’s not beat about the bush here. In all these years, various facets of interest and popularity, there’s never been the cult following that will be required to propel nobody to someone.
Knowing what you need to move forward is an important realisation.
However, that whole ‘sell thyself by whatever means’ thing is still not happening. I can’t reconcile capitalism with my own journey. It’s just not right, or ethical, and so going forward it is time to look for better means and values. They’re out there, of course: however, there will need to be a measure of compromise along the way. Comprehension is my first step towards true enlightenment.
Waffles are also incredibly important. No, really, they are. These tiny morsels of wonder were the reason I gained so much weight over two pregnancies, which it has taken nearly two decades to shed. Only now that I understand the true relationship between eating and weight management, have they reappeared in my life, under the strict understanding that it takes X minutes to burn the calories they contain.
They’ve become a symbol for the ability to control my own destiny.
This bit here (/points at ground) isn’t a metaphorical crossroads, it’s the real thing. What I know is that the way forward is very clearly marked, for the first time in probably a year. We’re going this way, and the next time we stop to regroup or have a snack, an awful lot will have been left behind. It’s no bad thing either: with the writing not just metaphorically on the wall, this was always going to be the next step.
This weekend, undoubtedly, has been a game changer.