Yesterday, I got quite upset. It was a combination of things, culminating in someone who is really respected getting grumpy over my enthusiasm, for something which is really being looked forward to. Then I remembered the ‘opinions’ are not facts’ rule, and the ‘enjoyment is subjective’ sub-clause and it’s okay for people not to like the same things you do.
The bigger issue occurs when someone subsequently bimbles along and then tries to convince that actually, you are the problem. That opinion is unacceptable. The difference is in the wording. This is the correct mindset, notwithstanding it being held not to be the correct mindset. It doesn’t matter that it is logical, sensible and applicable. You’re wrong, because you don’t agree with the person who objects to you not agreeing with them.
Welcome to the Pedantry Circle of Hell, population those people.
I spend a lot of my life arguing with people like this. By all accounts, at my age, I should be a person like this, but that is absolutely never going to happen. There are plenty of other people making the dick moves in the World, they don’t need anyone else. So, this space is now one where lots of things will be considered, nothing ignored if it is done with civility and well-exampled.
However, yesterday I saw comments by people ignored or removed from my feed some time ago that just reinforce this attitude hasn’t altered for, in at least one case, a decade. This is not about being right for myself either: pointing a finger at someone else for their inability to alter themselves is no better than the reversal of the action. To be better, all of those things need to be put aside.
That’s where I’ve been falling down for quite some time.